


you make it so hard

by stevebucke



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock - Fandom, Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, M/M, POV John Watson, Post-Reichenbach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-30
Updated: 2013-12-30
Packaged: 2018-01-04 08:01:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1078518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stevebucke/pseuds/stevebucke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i wrote this for my secret santa recipient, runa-the-cucumbersnatch (tumblr) this christmas</p>
    </blockquote>





	you make it so hard

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this for my secret santa recipient, runa-the-cucumbersnatch (tumblr) this christmas

it's been a year  
since you came back  
it's been ten months  
since she died  
and i still don't understand  
why you did it  
i get how  
but why, sherlock  
bloody bastard  
and why did you wait so long  
you watched  
you knew  
what i was going through  
that i had mary  
i know you got jealous  
now we're lovers  
but you're still hiding  
something  
i loved mary, i did  
but she wasn't you  
i could've happily spent the rest of my life with her  
but then you came back  
you answered my pleas  
and then she died  
a bittersweet twist  
death follows you everywhere, sherlock  
i know it's an occupational hazard  
but sometimes  
i get tired  
moving this much  
running  
i hate running  
i wish we could just stand and face it  
but that would mean you admitting  
to emotions  
to your fear  
i know you're scared, sherlock  
i can tell  
i love you  
but that comes with hazards  
just like your job  
one day, one of us will be left  
alone  
because you got the other killed  
i don't know if it will be me or you  
i do know that we need to stop  
stop running  
because if we don't,  
i might have to leave  
i didn't sign up for this, sherlock  
i was just going to be your flatmate  
i want to stay  
but you make it so hard to

-jw


End file.
